Joy

October 8, 2009

“I can see that when I have felt joy I have felt more alive than at any other time in my life.” -John Eldredge

Running, running, running. The sun at my back, the wind pushing me forward. My shoes sink into the sand and small grains seep into my socks. My weight pushes my feet into the sand, my legs push me forward. Breathing deeply, I run. The white foam chases after me – it’s running with me, parallel to my path. The air is alive with salt and mist from the sea. Sea shells explode across the sand, crunching beneath my quick strides.

Running, running, running. There are a few people out – sets of older couples. Some holding hands, others simply sitting and enjoying the sun’s last stretch of the day. It is peaceful.

I think about the week, the month, I have spent here in Spain. Has it really been a month? I can’t believe how quickly the time has gone by.

I am happy. I am more than happy. I am content. Joyful. Alive.
This month has been one of the most exciting, most joyful, and happiest months of my life.

I am in awe at how much God has blessed this experience. It is beautiful here – at first I found the quiet of Antilla to be lonesome, but now I find a comfort in the quietness. There is a different pace of life here – a pace that I find both frustrating and relaxing. Things are not done quickly in Spain – things are done little by little, slowly. You wash your clothes, but then you hang them on the clothesine. You wait a day for them to dry – slowly. You go to the store to buy a cell phone, and you wait in line for 30 minutes. You finally reach a customer service representative, and they help you – slowly. You go to a store to buy stamps during the afternoon, but the store is closed for siesta. The store opens at 10:30am and closes at 2pm. It reopens at 6pm and closes again at 9pm – you adapt to the schedule, slowly. Being here in Spain, especially being here in Antilla, forces you to live. Slowly.

And although this different pace of life can be frustrating at times, it has made me think about how I should be living. My home culture is not slow-paced – we are a culture of efficiency and speed. We have fast food, fast internet, fast forward. High speed, high efficiency. We have a stove that boils water in 30 seconds. We have a device that allows us to record the shows we want to watch and also allows us to skip commercials. We have self check-out lines. We have express check-out lines. We want speed, efficiency, productivity. Shifting from a culture of speed and immediate gratification to a culture focused on people and living slowly has been a challenging and rewarding experience.

Running, I think about this. There are certain things that I appreciate about both cultures. Which culture is better? I don’t know. And I don’t think deciding which culture is “better” is important. What I do know is this: I am incredibly happy here. And at this moment, with the wind at my back, running, running, I feel alive. I am well rested from a siesta earlier in the afternoon. I feel full from fresh, healthy food. I am thankful for my children at school – their bright eyes, their cheerful hellos, the way in which they become excited when I walk into the classroom. I am humbled by the patience and kindness of my co-workers, especially that of Oti.

I hear the ocean now as I run. The ocean is the first thing I hear when I wake up. It is the last thing I hear before I go to bed. I feel the sun now. Running, running. I am utterly content, and I am undoubtedly confident that I am right where God wants me to be.

And for this, I am thankful. Joyful. Incredibly, unbelievably, and truly alive.

Running, running. I think to myself: And this is how God intended for us to live…