Trickles

Life in Spain lately has been a combination of all things amazing sprinkled with trickles of sadness. A girls' trip to Granada this past weekend served as a wonderful get away full of tapa-eating, sangria-drinking, gab-festing, all-night-dancing, Alhambra-viewing memories. :) We returned to Huelva on Sunday after the five hour bus ride, and I stayed for a couple of nights with Ashley. Monday and Tuesday consisted of beach trips, relaxing, and shopping -- all in all, it was honestly one of the best weekends I've had in Spain -- and that's saying a lot considering all of the wonderful weekends we've been blessed with here. :)

But today at school, I came to the harsh realization that next week is my last week at work. I tremble even typing those words.

Last.

Week.

"Ohh...well maybe I can come in during June and help with some things..." I offered to Oti, hoping that I could prolonge the leaving process.
"No...I think it's ok. I don't think we have much else for you do to. I will let you know if I think of something though." She sweetly answered.
She montioned toward my pile of flashcards to laminate and posters to make "So this will be your last project."
My eyes fell to the ground as her sentence hit me. "I...I can't think about it!" I protested. "It just makes me too sad."
"But you will always be here," she explained. "With your signs and everything you've made...you will always be in the school."
And then I felt them -- the things I have been pushing back and pushing down and pushing everywhere away from me -- those feelings of sadness and reality and leaving. They started coming in tears. My red eyes and teary face looked up.
And there was sweet Oti, almost mirroring my exact look, teary eyed and sad "You can't cry, because if you cry, then I cry!" she exclaimed.
"Aww...ok, ok! Let's just take a breath."
We breathed. But my tears still wouldn't stop.
"I'm...I'm going to the bathroom...I'll be right back." I forced the words out.

And there it was. The reality of it all. The fact that I'm leaving this place I love. The closer the time comes, the harder facing this reality is. But it also fills me with hope. Coming here to Spain was totally a God-given gift -- and he truly has shown me the amazing things he can -- and he wants -- to give to us when we will simply rest in him and listen to him. So if he has blessed me this much now, I can hardly imagine what he has in store for the future. :)

I pray that you may be blessed wherever you are, with whatever you are doing. And if you feel those tears coming up for any reason, I pray that you have the strength to feel those feelings and the faith to trust in God's love for you and your future.

I love you,
Brittany :)



"For your eyes have seen all the great work of the Lord that he did..." -Deuteronomy 11:7